Fresh Out of Heroes
by ButItsBetterIfItsBrucas
Summary: But the moment psycho Derek held the knife up to her neck I realized I couldn’t really go on without her. That’s what they always say though, right? You don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone? Well I was moments from having everything taken away.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer- I don't own One Tree Hill or any of its characters.

Fresh Out of Heroes

I was always so caught up in Lucas that I don't think I ever really noticed the people who had been beside me my entire life. Yeah, I know what you're thinking. Girl meets boy. Girl falls in love with boy. Girl proceeds to forget about her friends. Or at least forget about what they did for her.

The moment Lucas and I got together for the first _official_ time, I forgot the girl code. The code of honor. Hoes over Bro's. Actually, I guess you could say I forgot about that a long time ago. As in the first time Lucas and I got together. You never date your best friend's ex-boyfriend. And you most _certainly_ never hook up with your best friend's _current_ boyfriend. I don't even know why after we stopped classifying each other as friends I started dating Lucas. You don't hurt the people you love like that, and despite what I might have said, I do love Brooke. I guess the problem was that I love Lucas too.

Does that mean I love Lucas more than I love Brooke? No, not really. Not in my eyes anyway. It's a different type of love. Lucas well, he's always saving me. At least that's what I used to think I loved about him.

But then, sitting there in the basement tied to a chair with Brooke next to me, I realized that she had saved me long before he had. Not in the same sense of course, she hadn't physically attacked anyone in order to save my life, but she had saved me in a way that meant…more.

After my mom died, I was lost and alone and I had nobody to turn to. Dad was always gone and without mom, I had pretty much nothing left to live for. Brooke gave me reason again. She came by to check on me every day after the death of my mom, and at the funeral, it was Brooke that stood beside and leaned against me so we were holding each other up. It was Brooke who cried with me and wiped away my tears. It was Brooke who made sure I was doing okay and would call me at random hours of the night just to make sure I was still fine.

She always understood that I wasn't great, and she accepted that. She just wanted to make sure that I was getting by. What I don't think she really ever realized was that if it hadn't been for her, I don't think I ever would have made it. She was everything I wasn't. She was happy and bright and loving in the places where I was lost and dark and cold. We balanced each other out perfectly and the moment psycho Derek held the knife up to her neck, I realized I couldn't really go on without her.

That's what they always say though, right? You don't know what you've got till it's gone? Well I was moments away from having everything taken away from me and I had a chance to save it. I was getting a second chance. A third if you're really counting.

I still wonder why she came back for me. It was prom. Brooke had been dreaming about this day for her entire life. I must say, it surprised me that she even gave up a few minutes to come and check on me after everything I did to her. But that's just Brooke for you. I guess she's a better friend than I ever will be. I already knew that though. That's why I knew that I couldn't let Derek hurt her.

Ah, I can hear you protesting now. I didn't let him hurt her, but I hurt her myself, right? Well trust me when I say the blows I dealt her were much softer than any Derek would have given. Does that mean I saved her? Well…I tried. Then I ran. I left her tied to a chair knowing that if I died, Derek would go finish her off before my body went cold. Not so much of a hero after all huh?

But Brooke…she was a hero. He was so close to…violating me I still get shudders thinking about it, but then Brooke saved me. Again. I don't know how she got her hands untied but a part of me wishes she hadn't.

When she hit him with the bar or whatever it was, I thought we were safe. I thought we could take him. It was all choking and hitting and scratching from there. Brooke got thrown to the floor numerous times, but she's not the kind of person who just gives up. She's a fighter. But then again, so is Derek.

I don't remember much after that, its all kind of a hazy. There was the kick from cheer camp in eighth grade and Derek went tumbling backwards over Brooke only something went wrong. His leg hooked around her as he fell and she wasn't braced for the impact enough.

Why wasn't she ready? I don't know. The doctors said her body was bruised from his attack and he must have hit a spot where she was already in pain. They said you curl in to protect yourself when you're in pain, only when she curled in she forgot that somebody was falling down the stairs on top of her. _With_ her.

If everything was a hazy after Brooke hit him with the bar, it was a blur after that. There was screaming and crying and the thuds of my feet repeatedly kicking Derek as I yelled at Brooke to get up. Once I was sure he couldn't get up and attack her again, I rushed to Brooke's side and I think I blacked out after that.

And now? Well now I'm sitting by Brooke's bed as they get the room ready for her surgery. She's going in a few moments but I can't leave her side. She came back for me. She still loves me. I can't believe it's really my Brookie lying on the table looking so small and frail. There's still red lipstick on her lips making the rest of her face look scarily pale and white. I reach to brush a strand of hair out of her face but my hand hesitates and hovers a few seconds above it instead. I'm afraid of what she'll feel like. I'm afraid she'll be cold.

"It's time to take her in Miss," the nurse says, putting a hand on my shoulder and pulling me slightly away. I pull away from her and stand next to Brooke's bed again. It's not her. This can't be Brooke. This can't be the brave strong girl who always stood up for me looking so little and lonely now. I don't believe it. I can't believe it.

"Give me a minute?" I asked quietly, my voice cracking.

"She's in critical condition, and if we don't get her into the OR now, we might lose her." The nurse says, getting ready to wheel Brooke out of the room. Maybe out of my life.

"Please," I whisper, trying to make the lady understand without taking my eyes off of Brooke. "She came back for me."

"We have to go now," the nurse says, pushing the bed gently now like if she jolted it too hard Brooke would be lost. I can't loose her.

"You don't understand," I say, reaching out now and without hesitation brushing the hair away from her face. The lady stops the bed and I lean down to stare at Brooke's closed eyes. I will them to open. She needs to be okay.

"We have to go," the nurse repeats.

"She can't die," I whisper, refusing to close my eyes incase I miss a second of seeing her. "She saved me."


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer- I own nobody and nothing

I can't help but think that maybe if I pray enough she'll be alright. Maybe Keith will put in a good word for her because God knows he loved that girl. But then again, the more reasonable part of me doesn't believe that at all. If she's going to make it through this, Brooke is going to need to do it by herself. Honestly, that's the thing that scares me the most. Because what if she gives up? Brooke hasn't had a whole lot of miracles working for her lately. It seems to me though that it's all partially my fault that Brooke has been caught in this downward spiral.

First of all I tore the life long friendship that Brooke and Peyton once had apart. It was because of me that Brooke was practically homeless and had to move in with Rachel. Because of the newly developed friendship between the two, Rachel got expelled from school and Brooke was left alone again. Even more so alone after Haley found out about the sex tape Brooke and Nathan had made and practically disowned her as a friend. Of course that didn't even compare to Peyton telling Brooke she was dead to her. I'm sure she didn't mean for it to become more than an emotional death.

No. I can't let myself think like that. Brooke is still alive. She is strong and brave and she won't give up. I'll give anything for her to make it through this.

"Lucas?" Haley's quivering voce cracks and I look up at her from my seat in the cold plain waiting room. A tear leaks out from Haley's eye and she takes a long shuddering breath to try and control her emotions. "Karen's on her way."

I nod and hold one hand out for Haley. She takes it and sits in the chair next to me. Brooke would want mom to come. She always said Karen was the closest thing to family she'd ever had with the exception of Peyton. I look up and search the room for Peyton, my eyes finally resting on the girl sitting in the corner of the room, her beautiful white prom dress splattered in blood.

For the first time in our lives together, I had failed to save her. Strangely enough, that wasn't what bothered me though. The one thing I can't seem to get out of my mind is that I had promised Brooke that I would save her. I had promised her and then the first time she ever _really_ needed me, I wasn't there. I had failed. And now she was paying for it in the worst way possible.

"Lucas?" Haley's soft voice breaks through my thoughts again and I turn to her, watching as she quickly wipes a few stray tears off her cheeks. "Could you talk to-" she pauses and takes a few deep breaths before swallowing the tears in her throat and continuing. "Talk to Nathan? He won't even look at me."

I look across the room again and my eyes find Nathan. He's sitting in his chair with his head in his hands and it takes me a moment to realize he's shaking. I look back at Haley but she just shrugs so I stand and make my way towards my brother.

"Hey Nate," my voice sounds rough and raspy from so much time in silence. It's been so long. Too long. I can't let myself think something went wrong with the surgery though. I need to find out what's wrong with Nathan. I've never seen him like this. He still doesn't look up at me and I wait patiently for him to say something.

"It wasn't just sex," he mumbles, keeping his head buried in his hands.

"What?" I ask, thrown off by his statement. What did this have to do with Brooke? With anything?

"The tape," Nathan clarifies, lifting his head to look me in the eyes. "It wasn't just sex."

I pull away from him, still a little confused as to what he means by this.

"Brooke was…" he stops, his voice lowers, his head drops. "She was wasted that night and I was pretty out of it but I knew exactly what I was doing." He stops again and looks back up at me. "I wanted it. I knew what would happen if anyone found out, but she was- God Luke, you didn't know her back then. She was…" he runs a hand through his hair and I try to say something, anything, but my tongue refuses to interrupt Nathan. I want to know. I'm hungry for any information about her past. Anything that will distract me from the thoughts of her future.

Nathan smiles in wonder and looks up at me. "She was perfect. Broken- but perfect."

I never knew anything about Brooke and Nathan's past together but from his smile I can guess that their relationship was once a little more meaningful than I had ever imagined.

"Were you two…were you..." I choke on my words and Nathan touches my shoulder lightly. He pulls his hand back soon after and smiles again.

"We used to be best friends," he tells me, closing his eyes and running a hand through his hair again. "Up until high school and we both got a bit more out of control we- besides Peyton the two of us were-" the smile drops off Nathan's face as he glances towards the door where we were told Brooke's surgeon would be emerging from. "After the tape came out, I promised myself I'd make it better between the two of us. Like it used to be. And now-" his eyes stayed glued to the door but I cant take my own off his face. "She might not make it."

I stand quickly, taking a few quick steps away from my brother before turning back to him.

"She _will_ make it." I need her to make it.

"Lucas!" I spin towards the door and my mom is standing there. Behind her stands Mouth and leaning against his side, tears evident in her eyes, is Rachel.

"Mom," I walk quickly towards them,. Afraid that if I stay in one place for too long I'll burst. My mom's eyes are wide and frightened so I pull her in for a hug, burying my face in her hair.

"Is there any news?" Mouth asks, looking around the bleak room, searching for someone to question.

I hate how helpless I feel as I shake my head, watching as Rachel buries her head in mouths shoulder and cries softly. Form the way she takes gasping breaths between her sobs I can tell that she's trying to stop. She is the only person who is crying in the room. Everyone else seems too afraid to.

"Rachel." Bevin arrives with a train of people behind her, all wearing prom dresses and tuxes.

This isn't how it was supposed to go. I wasn't supposed to be waiting desperately in a hospital on Prom night for news of my critical condition dubbed girlfriend. Ex. Girlfriend. I pull away from mom and turn towards Peyton once more. She's still sitting in the corner of the room staring blankly oat the wall. I take one last look at my mom who is talking to the secretary and than at Mouth who is transferring Rachel tenderly onto Bevin's shoulder and going to talk to Haley and then I turn to face Peyton. I kneel down as soon as I am level with her but she continues to stare past me as if I'm not there.

"Peyton," my voice is soft and gentle but she ignores it. "Hey, baby, talk to me." I reach one hand up and caress her face gently and after a few moments of silence, her eyes shift over to me. "Are you okay?" I ask even though I am well aware of the fact that she is far from it.

Peyton stays motionless for a moment before her mouth opens the smallest bit. Right when I think she's about to say something, tears surface in her eyes and her mouth snaps shut.

I smooth the hair away from her face and search her eyes for whatever it is she's trying to tell me. And all the while that I'm trying to discover what it is Peyton is thinking, I can't help but imagine Brookes face. Whatever Brooke was feeling, weather it was anger when Rachel tried to take over her life, hurt when she got another call from her parents secretary telling her they were extending their trip, pain when she looked at Peyton after they falling out, happiness at ever kiss I had ever given her, and love every morning we had woken up next to each other combined with content and bliss, there was one thing that Peyton and Brooke had always had in common. That blank indifferent stare they both donned when they shut out the rest of the world. Peyton now wears the same look I have seen on Brookes face countless times as she drowned her insecurities and pain in a glass of tequila. Nothing.

Suddenly I realize I would give up anything and everything I have just to keep Brooke alive. I would do anything just to see her smile at me one more time and quirk her eyebrow up in that incredibly sexy way coupled with her adorable dimples. And so, even though I don't believe in God as much as some say I should, I stay kneeling in front of Peyton and I pray.

I bargain with God just to keep Brooke alive. I list all the things I'm willing to give up if he lets her be okay. I apologize for not praying before and for not giving up basketball or telling anyone about my heart condition because I was selfish. I beg and I plead and even though I'm fighting it with everything in me, one small tear slips itself out of the corner of my eye and trails slowly down my face. I promise that I'll never leave Brooke alone and that I'll take care of her with every last bit of strength that I have in me if she just survives this.

I am about to close my eyes when I see Peyton draw in a sharp breath and her eyes widen slightly. My head flies around and I shoot to my feet when I see Brooke's doctor stepping out of the corridor and pulling his gloves off.

This is it. Please God, let her be okay.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer- I am not a doctor or a med student. Mark owns all.

Fresh Out of Heroes

It's been such a long time since I've been worried about anyone besides Haley, my mom, and the baby, that the growing spark of fear at the pit of my stomach feels foreign and unfamiliar. It's been roughly two years since I've had a decent conversation with Brooke Davis and now, crowding in with the fear and fighting for dominance in my heart I feel a suddenly overwhelming sense of regret.

"Anyone for Brooke Davis?"

Over half the room raises to their feet. It seems that the majority of Tree Hill High has ditched the prom to ensure that their beloved cheer captain and prom queen is okay. What surprises me is that it looks like a lot of them actually care. But their pain is nothing compared to mine. They don't know Brooke the way I did. Do. They didn't know her back when she was afraid of the dark and would call me in the middle of the night to come chase the monsters away. They didn't know her when she discovered her parents thought her fear of the dark was weak and banned me from coming over. Nobody besides the two of us know that even then I would still sneak over and climb into her window just to make sure she was still safe. Finally she started believing what her parents said and learned to chase away the demons herself. It was around that time that Brooke and I were introduced to the crazy world of parties and alcohol and the two of us descended into our little worlds of darkness together.

When we finally started getting along with Lucas and Haley, I actually believed that we would be coming out together and now, I can't help but wish that our positions were reversed and Brooke was the one who had emerged from the shadows and I had been left under.

The fear racing through my body forces me to my feet and I shove my way through people until I've reached Karen who stands nervously next to the doctor. Lucas and Haley soon join us and Haley latches herself onto my arm where I can feel her shivering. I stand impatiently and the doctor just stares out at the crowd waiting behind me with wide eyes.

"Mr. Samson," Karen says, wringing her hands anxiously together.

"Ah, yes," he turns to us and smiles slightly but the fear still wont leave me. "Miss Davis is currently stable although she is still in a precarious state and at the moment unconscious. The surgery went well but there isn't a full recovery rate yet that-"

I stopped listening to him already though. Nothing else mattered anyway. Alive. Stable. Brooke is alive. I let out a long whoosh of breath that I wasn't even aware I was holding in, and Haley sags with relief next to me.

"Can I go see her?"

It's Peyton's voice that asks the question and I turn to watch her as she walks up to Dr. Samson.

"Can I go see Brooke?"

Dr. Samson looks faintly uncomfortable and hesitates before replying. "You have to understand Miss that she has severe internal damage, she isn't awake at the moment and we are still unsure about the extent of her mental-"

"I don't mind," Peyton cuts in quickly, shaking her head. "I just want to see her."

"Well…" Dr. Samson pauses again. "I'm not sure if she's up for visitors but before the procedure she did become conscious for a brief moment and she asked us to call somebody…"

I quickly wrack my brain for who it could have been. Karen? Lucas? Haley? Her parents? Probably not me. I feel another sting of regret but ignore it and focus on Dr. Samson again.

"Mouth? I think that's what it was…and Rachel."

I feel a small sinking feeling somewhere in the general direction of my heart and Peyton's face falls. Lucas himself looks heartbroken by Samson's words and even a little…betrayed?

"We're here," Mouth says quickly appearing as if from thin air, Rachel by his side. "We want to—if it's alright—we'd be happy—" he stops and I start to back away towards my seat again.

"Please, we'll go see her," Rachel says in a soft voice, brushing her hair from her face and taking a deep breath.

When they come back twenty minutes later I am still sitting motionless in my seat as I watch Lucas argue fiercely with him mom. I don't know what they're saying but it undoubtedly has to do with Brooke. They don't even see Rachel and Mouth come out of the room. I look down.

"Nathan—" I look up to find Mouth standing in front of me. Unsure. Timid. Scared. "We're taking turns going in to see her…we thought…"

"Is she awake?" I stand quickly, looking over Mouth's shoulder almost as if I expect her to be standing there.

"No…" Mouth wipes the back of his hand quickly across his eyes and shakes his head. "Still not awake yet." He glances back across the waiting room then looks back at me. "I thought maybe you and Haley would want to visit her…"

I don't wait for him to finish but move past him towards where Haley is sitting. She looks up at me when I stop in front of her then climbs unsteadily to her feet. I reach out to help her up then together we make our way towards Brooke's room.

The fear from before is returning. I'm so scared I can hardly think although I'm not really aware of what it is that I fear. I reach down and take hold o Haley's hand and she glances up at me and squeezes my own. I send her a small smile. The walk to the hospital room is taking far longer then it should.

"She'll be okay," Haley says softly. I'm not sure if she's trying to convince me or herself.

"I know," I try to tell her, only my mouth doesn't seem to be working and nothing comes out.

When we finally reach the room my heart is beating like a jackhammer in my chest. I hold Haley's hand a little tighter until I can feel her wedding ring imprinting itself on my palm. Haley takes a deep breath and opens the door. The room would be cold. Empty. Plain. If only it weren't for the flowers, dozens of colorful, bright, blossoming flowers covering every wall from floor to ceiling. Balloons and get well soon cards litter the dresser and every uncovered space and I wonder, in that single moment suspended in time, who had a chance to go out and buy her a card while she was in surgery? Maybe it was their own way of reassuring themselves that she would make it through this. That she would be okay.

Haley takes a gasping breath and I follow her eyes to the center of the room where I find a sight that sends cold shivers down my spine. I close my eyes tight against the image but find it engraved on my closed eyelids anyway. The bright vibrant colors surrounding Brooke make her look all the more pale and small. A beeping monitor by the side of her bed keeps track of her heart rate and the wires, tubes, attached to her make a choked sob rise in my throat. I swallow it and open my eyes. Haley pulls away from me and moves slowly to the bed. She bridges the space separating them and leans down over Brooke and rests their foreheads together. My heart nearly breaks at the sight.

"Brooke, baby, it's me! Tutor mom! And I need—I need you to wake up now, okay?" Her voice is shaky with tears. Haley closes her eyes and I move to a chair in the darkest corner of the room. Some small part of my brain recognizes that it must be nearing morning because sunlight is starting to slant softly in through the windows and highlight the golden strands of Haley's hair and make the normally glossy bright hair of Brooke look dull and flat. Haley lets out a gasping sob then clenches her eyes shut tighter.

"You have to be okay Brooke; you need to wake up for me, okay? I need you to be strong and I'll help you through this, okay? Just open those beautiful green eyes of yours and let me help you. Please, do it for me Tigger, do it for me, okay? Wake up now."

I turn my head away, unable to watch any longer.

"Brooke," Haley whispers, and I can almost see a single tear drop from her quivering chin out of the corner of my eye. I can tell its getting harder for her to get the words out now.

"Brookie," Haley breaths, I see her hand come up and smooth Brooke's hair from her face. "Wake up." It's whispered now. Soft, tears in a thick underlying tone on the edge of her words. "I need you." I almost can't hear her anymore.

"Brooke?" Louder this time. Loud enough that I turn in time to see Brookes eyes flutter. Her finger twitches. I hold my breath. Haley is downright sobbing now, her hair falls in messing waves around her face as she leans over Brooke and cries into her shoulder.

It appears as if Brooke is emerging from a heavy sleep, her eyes blink once, twice, a hand rises from the starch white sheets and lands softly on Haley's shoulder. Haley pulls away and looks at Brooke through a tearful, wondrous smile.

Brooke smiles back but I notice immediately that something is wrong. Her smile is blank. Bland. It borders on polite. It doesn't reach her eyes and the instantly noticeable absence of dimples hits me with the force of a rocket. It wavers for a moment then disappears.

Haley wipes the tears off her cheeks and Brooke's mouth opens slowly. Painfully. My heart almost stops. Then, in a voice that's scratchy and rough and dry and far raspier then any I've ever heard uttered from her beautiful mouth, she whispers, "Do I know you?"


End file.
